Control isn’t always about dominance—it’s about safety.
When your partner never lets you take the lead, it doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t trust you. Sometimes it means they once trusted too much.
Leading gives her a sense of direction, a way to prevent the world from spinning faster than she can handle. Maybe she’s learned that when others lead, she loses herself. So she learned to guide—not out of pride, but out of self-preservation.
It’s easy to mistake her insistence for stubbornness. But what you’re really seeing is her fear of chaos. She doesn’t want to be carried; she wants to know where she’s stepping. And yet, beneath that control lies a quiet longing—to be able to let go, to feel safe enough not to plan every move.
Your role isn’t to fight her control, but to understand it. To show her, through consistency and patience, that she can trust the rhythm without always setting it. That she can surrender without losing herself.
When she takes the lead, she isn’t pushing you away—she’s inviting you to keep up. She’s saying, “Walk with me, not behind me.” And if you do, you’ll find that one day, she might finally pause—just long enough to let you take the first step.