Two little boys stole a big bag of oranges

Two little boys stole a big bag of oranges from a neighbour and decided to go to a calm place to share the lot equally.

One of them suggested the nearby cemetery.

As they were jumping the big gate to enter the cemetery, two oranges fell out of the big bag, but they didn’t bother to pick them up since they had enough in the bag.

A few minutes later, a drunkard on his way from a bar passed near the cemetery gate and heard a voice saying, “One for me, one for you, one for me, one for you…”

He immediately sobered up and ran as fast as he could to a church nearby, for the priest, “Father, please come with me. Come and witness God & Satan sharing corpses at the cemetery.”

They both ran back to the cemetery gate, and the voices continued, “One for me, one for you, one for me, one for you…”

Suddenly, the voice stopped counting & said, “What about the two at the gate?”

The priest almost ran past the church gate…shouting, “We are not dead yet oooohh!!!”

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Jimmy and Matty, ages 8 and 4, were excessively mischievous.

They were always getting into trouble and their parents knew if any mischief occurred in their town, the two boys were probably involved.

The boys’ mother heard that a preacher in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys. The preacher agreed, but he asked to see them individually. The mother sent Matty in the morning, and planned to send Jimmy to see the preacher in the afternoon.

The preacher, a huge man with a deep booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him sternly, “Do you know where God is, son?”

The boy’s mouth dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there wide-eyed with his mouth hanging open. So the preacher repeated the question in an even sterner tone, “Where is God?!”

Again, Matty made no attempt to answer. The preacher raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy’s face and bellowed, “Where is God?!”

The boy screamed and bolted from the room, ran directly home and dove into his closet, slamming the door behind him. When his older brother found him in the closet, he asked, “What happened?”

Matty, gasping for breath, replied, “We are in BIG trouble this time! GOD is missing, and they think WE did it!”